Remember To Be True To Yourself

What to do when you don't recognize yourself anymore

Whether you are a busy professional, a devoted parent, or partner in marriage or significant relationship, it is easy to lose your sense of self in service of others. Have you ever had a moment when you look in the mirror and wonder - who is that person reflected back at me?

How can you balance being of service to others and being true to yourself? The key to being true to yourself is being self-aware. With mindful awareness comes the opportunity to remember to be true to yourself. At times you may live and work on auto-pilot, in the space of rushing and doing for the purpose of getting things done. Can you relate? You may be checking off to-do's, but you are likely not being authentic.

So how do you get clear on what being authentic means to you? That clarity comes from knowing your values. Your values represent what's important to you in life. Knowing your values helps you understand what motivates—and demotivates you, what you enjoy, what inspires you and what you might like more of…

• By building a life/lifestyle around our values you also create a life that is deeply satisfying and meaningful.

• Values change over time—they're always moving. Values deepen as you grow to understand yourself better. Your values can also be situational i.e. what's true for you at work may not be true for you at home.

In order to remember to be true to yourself, you need to be clear on your values. In addition, having skills to manage your stress and remain emotionally agile are key. Under stress, your emotional reactivity may lead you in a direction that is out of alignment and in hindsight, feels really inauthentic! Learning skills to be fluid in times of turmoil so that you can check back with WHO you really want to be, will support you in being your true self.

Some tips to manage stress and to be psychologically and emotionally flexible include:

• Embrace the power of pause. When the stove is hot, you need to react and pull away. In most other "hot" situations, you do not need to react and can choose to respond. The difference between reacting and responding is mindful awareness. Can you be the observer of your thoughts and feelings and recognize the importance of pausing? In the moment you pause, step away, open a window or find some other way to tune into yourself, you can access your logical brain and create a calm and confident response.

• Emotional flexibility means you have what it takes to bounce back from hurt feelings and choose your path forward. Relying on your reserves and resilience are great strategies in the moment. You've been there before, you've survived. What did it take? How can you mimic those actions now?

There is nothing more important to me in my work than supporting my clients to uniquely express themselves and feel the power of being true to themselves! It is a rush of joy!